Most of us know where we want to go, don't we? We know that we want more money. We know that we want the perfect, emotionally available man who's ready for commitment. And we see popular affirmations like “money comes easily to me” and “what I want, wants me” that are supposed to change your whole life…
But knowing where we want to go without knowing where we’re starting... is like telling a GPS where you want to go without telling it where your journey begins. The affirmations are part of the directions you take that get you there, but without identifying and clearing your limiting beliefs... you haven't started your car or left the driveway.
In other words, you can say affirmations all the live long day, but as long as you've still got limiting beliefs running through your mind... your desire won't manifest. Not because you're being punished or tortured or the Universe is trying to force you to change... but because there's no room for your desires while you continue perpetuating your limiting beliefs.
Let's break this down: Your thoughts create your feelings. Your feelings create your vibration. Your vibration creates your reality. For example, when you feel happiness, you are vibrating at the frequency of happiness. When you feel unsatisfied with how much money you make, you are vibrating at the frequency of dissatisfaction around money.
According to the law of attraction, like attracts like. You attract whatever you are a vibrational match for. This means, when you are thinking thoughts that make you feel happy, you are in the vibration of happiness; and you will continue to attract things that make you feel happy. On the other hand, when you are thinking thoughts that make you feel dissatisfied around your money, you're a vibrational match for that dissatisfaction; and you will continue to attract things that make you feel dissatisfied. Manifestation is the practice of deliberately shifting your thoughts and feelings to become aligned with what you want to experience. As you shift your thoughts, you shift your feelings, you shift your vibration, and you attract better feeling experiences.
So, how does this relate to your beliefs, you ask?
Well, your beliefs are just thoughts that you have thought over and over and over again. The more you think a thought, the more the momentum of that thought and energy build within you, until it's a belief [aka a thought that is automatically being triggered by your subconscious].
Limiting beliefs can feel tricky because they're being told subconsciously. This means, you won't be consciously aware of your limiting beliefs until you go searching through your mind to find them!
Do you know which stories are creating the reality that you’re living? Do you know which beliefs you’re operating out of at any given moment in time?
When you don’t know what your limiting beliefs are… they stay subconscious. In that place, you’re powerless to them. Because you can’t change what you have no awareness of.
You could be telling the story that you’re not enough… or that you can’t succeed… or that you were born to fail… all without being consciously aware.
I know you can, because I’ve done this, for sure. I spent the last four years telling myself that I was incapable of creating success for myself and that I should just give up… A part of me had been quitting this business before I even gave it everything I had… and I didn’t even know about it.
I was sabotaging my efforts… and I had no clue in the world... because those stories were running in the background of my awareness... in my subconscious mind.
When I recognized those patterns, I shifted them. I worked through them. But they wouldn’t have ever been cleared if I never developed the tools needed to identify them.
Once I released that bullshit story, then I could tell the new one: I was born to succeed, and I’m absolutely capable of getting what I desire. Now, I am much more energetically clear, and open to allow in more success. Ideas, clients, money, and visibility are flowing into my life with more ease than ever before. It is because I am practicing the thoughts and feelings (aka vibration) of I was born to succeed, and I'm absolutely capable of getting what I desire. The more I practice, these new thoughts, the more I feel these new feelings, and the more I become a vibrational match to my desires, attracting thoughts and experiences that make me feel inherently worthy of success and capable of achieving my goals.
This is the power of understanding what’s alive within your subconscious mind.
But how do you this? How do you identify your limiting beliefs when they're running outside of your awareness?
Here’s the trick: Your feelings will tell you exactly what your beliefs are in terms of your manifestations. Remember how I told you that your thoughts create your feelings? This is where that comes in. It's like... reverse engineering. When your subconscious mind fires a shitty limiting belief... you feel shitty. You might not notice what you're thinking, but you will notice that you don't feel good. And don't worry, if you're like me circa 2019 and you have trouble identifying how you feel and feeling your emotions, I've got you covered. Just keep reading, girl.
So, you have to know which thoughts and beliefs are *creating* your feelings. How many times do you feel badly [about what you want]... and instead of getting curious with your feelings, you look away?
You change the topic. You feel disappointed around your desire... and then maybe you hope that the feeling will change on its own. You hope that you can avoid it and one day think about what you want without feeling like shit.
Here’s the thing: Your feelings [like your beliefs, energy, and reality], won’t change until you change them. deliberately.
When you’re texting the new guy, and he doesn’t respond for a few hours, and you start to feel bad… What story are you telling there? Do you know?
Maybe it’s the story that you’re going to be rejected… and that makes you feel afraid. Maybe it’s the story that he’s not into you because you said something wrong and you can’t get love because your personality is “too much” to handle… and that makes you feel unworthy and rejected and not good enough and abandonable.
Or when you apply for the higher paying job, and they respond to your offer with a much lower number than you were anticipating, and you start to feel bad... What stories are you telling there? Do you know?
Maybe it's the story that you can't make the money you want because of your gender and/or race... and that makes you feel powerless, and angry, and defeated. Maybe it's the story that you're just not good enough and that it was naive of you to think that you could ever actually have your dream income... and that makes you feel hopeless, and like you're so far away from where you want to be.
The point is this: When you lean into your negative feelings with curiosity, you can identify the underlying stories causing the bad feelings. Then, you can shift them everything.
For example, when you’re telling the story that you are in a loving, committed relationship; and it’s safe to be in connection with another person... how you feel and respond to your romantic interest's behavior will shift. And so will the relationship.
Here's one more shift before we end this post because sometimes we do expose our beliefs with our thoughts and words; we've just got to become aware of them. Again, don't worry if you have trouble feeling your feelings, I'm getting there after this point.
How many times do you identify with your unwanted experiences with your thoughts?
How many times do you think thoughts like:
“I’m someone who worries a lot.”
“This is life for me because I’ve got anxious attachment.”
"No one ever supports me. I have to do everything myself.”
Let me put it simply: If you don’t want to have that experience, you *get to* stop identifying with it. Every one of those examples counts as a limiting belief. Every time you say these unwanted things about yourself and your reality, even in a matter-of-fact-way, you're you’re still affirming that unwanted story. You're perpetuating the unwanted vibration, subsequently pushing away what you want.
You can become the person of your desire. You can become the version of you who has what you desire. Your job is to shift the way you see yourself, your life, and the world. Your job is to practice seeing yourself as someone who trusts themselves, and life itself, to work things out in their favor. Or someone who has safe, secure attachment with others. Or someone who is deeply supported by people, systems, beliefs, and money. And of course, you can shift into any identity or experience that you want.
First, you’ve got to start becoming aware of how you affirm unwanted identities. You've got to start being more mindful of the things you let slip out of your mouth or linger in your mind.
So, let's recap: Your thoughts create your feelings. Your feelings create your vibration. Your reality is just a reflection of the vibration you live in most often. To shift your reality, you shift your vibration. To shift your vibration, you must become aware of the thoughts making you feel like shit. One way to do this is by paying attention to how you feel and getting curious. Another way to do this is by paying more attention to the thoughts you find yourself thinking, and the limiting phrases you're actually saying. The bottom line is that your job is to become more self aware.
To help you do this, I’d love to give you my FREE 6 Steps From Stuck To Self Aware Bundle. This self awareness tool will change your life by helping you see just how often you’re affirming unwanted identities. When you're feeling frustrated with life, or down around your manifestations, or just wondering what thoughts are creating the experiences you're having... you can use this bundle to figure out exactly which stories are creating those experiences in your life.
This is where I help you out if you're like me in 2019 and feeling lost around your emotions. Inside of the bundle, you'll get one of the greatest meditations I've ever created. It's made to help you feel your feelings, and to feel safe to feel those feelings. When you spend time doing the meditation, you'll also be spending time tapped into my energy. I'm someone who's very good at feeling her feelings, now. So spending time around me is a very, very good idea. The bundle is free. This is only one of the parts of it. You're welcome.
Inside, you'll also get an amazing prayer and my signature 6 step process for identifying any limiting belief. You'll answer 6 questions, plug your answers into a template, and then whatever limiting beliefs you're telling will be made incredibly clear. The more you use it, the more self aware you'll become. You'll start noticing how the same stories are at the root of many unwanted situations, too. It's powerful. I love it. You will, too.
You can scroll down the page or grab your free bundle, here.
Hello, if you're new! I'm so glad to have you here, reading my blog, and in my world.
I'm Nathallie Hughes: a luxury obsessed mindset & manifestation coach who helps self-led women overcome trauma and manifest their happily ever afters! On my platform, I help women go from chronic disappointment and powerlessness to emotional fulfillment and empowerment. I believe that what you want, need, and desire matters. And I also believe that you have the power to create a reality where you are receiving all that matters to you. My job is helping you remember who you are.
I'm so happy that you've found your way to me. You're going to love it here.
As a gift, I'd love to offer you my "6 Steps from Stuck To Self Aware" Bundle! In this free bundle, you'll learn my signature 6 step process for identifying any limiting belief. It's a must have for your personal development collection; after all, we can't shift limiting beliefs that we don't know exist.
